When I turned in my letter of resignation on Monday, I was slapped in the face. That slap was in the form of my boss saying he was not accepting my resignation. In the following 2 days negotiations happened. Well, I wasn’t really involved with the negotiations, but my boss at Bear Stearns kept offering me alternatives to me leaving.

I was pretty well set up to leave, and I had decided that I would not look back at his offers. One thing, however, kept popping up. He kept asking me, “What is it that you want?” And I continued to dodge his question and come up with answers. In reality, I didn’t really know what I wanted. I didn’t know why exactly I was unhappy with Bear Stearns. I also didn’t know what I wanted to do in my future. Read the rest of this entry »

So, I promised a few of my friends that I would try to update this page as often as possible. I would update every day, even, with the current happenings in my mind. This last week I have not lived up to that promise, but I have good reason. I have been working on finding another job in the past few weeks.

What does that mean? Well, I can’t talk about looking for a job on a public medium like a website (though I seriously doubt anyone from Bear would have even come across my little website to find out I was looking elsewhere). I have had an offer from a web development company and I decided to take it. Read the rest of this entry »

Today at work I was talking with co-workers who were searching for an answer to a problem. The meeting dispersed without an actual answer being given. Jerry said, “Wait, do we know the answer?” I, for some reason, decided to be ultrageek and say “There is no question, you are seeking an answer for something that doesn’t exist.”

Now, what I said was true, we didn’t actually need an answer to the question of procedure, what we were doing was fine. But then I got back to my desk and couldn’t get The Matrix out of my head! Read the rest of this entry »

New Yorkers really do make me laugh some times. Today’s selections of things that don’t happen in the west are not about pedestrian traffic! I escaped the office during lunch to make a call to a potential co-worker.

I decided to walk around the south east of my office, as I always tend to walk to the north east. I made the phone call and he was not in, so I left a message. I continued to walk around anyway. I passed a Wendy’s and McDonalds on Lexington before turning on 44th St. It seemed like a good street to turn on. As I walked down the street, I noticed another restaurant that was highly familiar. A burrito place. Read the rest of this entry »

I was minutes away from posting a 3 page long explanation about my life and how I am changing things around for myself. No more pity party, no more emo posts about being unhappy. Then I realized that was an emo post too. So I highlighted all of the text I had written out and not saved, then I deleted it all. The undo for the document is far in the past and beyond retrieval. If you want to know, you have to ask.

Now – moving onto a real post. It will encompass more of my present mind childe instead of reflecting backwards. I have been thinking about this for a while but I wanted to wait until I got unkommon/searchingforhim.com up and running. Well, I would rather write this now instead of waiting for that. I will have a more detailed, faith based, and researched article once I get unkommon up. Feel free to yell at me to finish it up. It has been far too long. Read the rest of this entry »

Anyone who has lived in the south knows that Bermuda can grow in very hot climates and often stay green year round. They also likely know that quite a large amount of people begin to itch if it touches the skin. It is an allergy. So, even though the grass is greener, it is also itchy. And if the grass isn’t itchy, and it’s still green – it probably rains more over there.

Pessimism is something I have no problem delving into. I tend to call it realism, as do most pessimists. The thing that really prompts me now is my current employment situation. Read the rest of this entry »

While I was walking into work from Grand Central I passed a businessman whose face was twitching. His eyebrows would twitch, is lips would pucker then loosen then smile. I have seem this before in people I know, and they can’t control it. I was thinking, what if these uncontrollable actions were actually caused by some sort of parasite. A bug or something that gained control of their face. It would be kind of scary if that were the case (it isn’t).

But my mind - well, my thoughts - brought me to other conclusions. Just because once I get an idea in my head I cannot drop it for the life of me. What if our brain were that parasite. Different brains react differently. This is something that we can easily tell through brain patterns and the chemicals flowing through our body. Each brain is distinct. What if the brain were a symbiotic parasitic lifeform, and the spine were its tail. It is controlling our bodies and all of our movements. It retains control and supresses our body by releasing endorphins and hormones. Read the rest of this entry »